I’m not at all shy in my dislike of CGI in movies. I HATE IT, HATE IT, HATE IT. Then tonight as I was watching ANTICHRIST, the Chaos Reigns fox scene sparked something in me that made me remember all of the other shitty movies with CGI animals in them. This list is by no means complete and I urge you to write your own worst in the comments section. This list is simply 10 examples that myself and my friend Tommy could come up with in about 20 minutes. We intentionally left out all SyFy movies, stuff like Frankenfish and KING KONG, but made it a rule that we had to have a YouTube video with each one to spotlight just how shitty the animals were in the scenes. I’ve also decided that putting the year next to the title of the film is essential so you can look at how, for instance, stuff in the new Indiana Jones movie is way worse than stuff in JUMANJI (I thought it would make the list, but compared to the ten we chose, it didn’t look that bad). If we would’ve had videos or videos that we would’ve been able to embed from YouTube, I AM LEGEND and DAY AFTER TOMORROW would’ve DEFINITELY been on the list. Since they weren’t, I present to you, the shittiest CGI animals ever created by man:
10. ERASER (1996)- CROCODILE
We have another crocodile scene coming up in the top 10, but the reason this one wasn’t ranked higher is because they actually used some real crocs in the scene AND this one was from 1996. Something we’ve noticed after we compiled the list is that the films from the 90’s are ranked lower than films in the late 2000’s.
9. DEEP BLUE SEA (1999)- SHARK
I legitimately like this movie and LOVE this scene. This kinda ranked up there with when Seagal bit the big one in EXECUTIVE DECISION as far as unexpected deaths go.
8. THE RING TWO (2005)- DEER
I stopped watching any horror out of Japan in the mid 2000’s and definitely wasn’t going near the remakes, so this one was pointed out to me by my friend Tommy. When I asked him what movies he could think of that had bad CGI animals in them, this was the first one he spouted off. I think you can see why.
7. ANTICHRIST (2009)- FOX
I know, I know. It’s hard to make a fox talk, but really? This? The vagina cutting and leg wheeling looked more believable. Someone get a fox voice coach over here on the double!
6. NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN (2007)- DEER
This scene destroyed me when I saw it for the first time in theaters. This was my favorite movie of 2007 and I’m still scratching my head as to why this looked so bad.
5. ROGUE (2007)- CROCODILE
After WOLF CREEK, I was so psyched that Doug McLean was going to be doing a killer croc movie in Australia. I couldn’t help but think that he had seen DARK AGE before and would totally one up it. Then, I put ROGUE in, actually enjoyed it for the first 9/10ths and then someone faxed this crocodile in and it totally ruined the thing for me. Boo!
4. INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL (2008)- CHOOSE YOUR OWN SHITTY CGI ANIMAL
I cannot begin to explain the problems with this movie, mainly being the ridiculously bad CGI. When the gopher popped out of its hole at the beginning, it was an omen. The monkey scene was also unforgivable. I found this Behind The Scenes clip of the ant scene on YouTube and it’s actually kind of perfect for this list. It shows you how many people go into the process of making these abominations and how they actually think this stuff looks good. Note: It doesn’t.
3. SNAKES ON A PLANE (2006)- SNAKE (DUH)
This selection was really easy. Like shooting CGI fish in a digital barrel. I gave myself a headache because I rolled my eyes so hard at this scene. There are lots worse looking CGI snakes in this movie, but this one kinda sums all of it up perfectly. Plus, “Snake Gets The Guy’s Weiner” could possibly be my favorite YouTube video title ever.
2. LOST (2004)- POLAR BEAR
Whoa mama! Right around the 10th episode or so, there is a scene where Walt is trapped behind some reeds and the polar bear is scratching at them. Yeah. If you saw that, it was mind blowingly shitty. I love the show, but like most things on this list….they almost reach perfection, but suffer from earth shatteringly bad digital effects.
1. LET THE RIGHT ONE IN (2008)- CATS
The absolute KING OF BAD CGI. This movie IS PERFECT except for this scene. I remember the first time I saw this I was sitting with about 8 other people in a theater at the Alamo. When this scene ended, everyone looked at each other and collectively asked what the hell was going on. It is so glaringly horrible! 1 real cat > 1,000 digital cats.
Great list! Maybe this is too easy, but does Jar Jar Binks count? How about those buffalo-looking things that Anakin rode around in Attack of the Clones?
Another one that comes to mind is Ozymandias’ lynx from Watchmen. Then again, how they’d do that without CGI, I’m not sure…
Was ‘Mega Shark V Giant Octopus’ too realistic? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fa7ck5mcd1o
Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus was a genre we chose to leave out. With most all SyFy Channel movies and animal vs. animal films, they are made to be campy and cheesy looking. We could easily do another list of titles like those: MANSQUITO, ICE SPIDERS, etc., but we decided to do animals in movies that, for the most part, were not the center of attention. So, like in ERASER or LET THE RIGHT ONE IN the Croc and Cat were not the main theme of the movie. Given, ROGUE, DEEP BLUE SEA and SNAKES ON A PLANE break that rule because they are all killer animal movies, but they were all just so incredibly bad looking that we had to put them on the list.
Nathan- Bubastis was totally one that came to mind, but he’s not really a real creature so we decided to leave him off the list.
A twitchy animatronic fox would have been way better for Antichrist. I think it would enhance the surreal tone.
But can we really blame Eraser? It was back in 1996. Not completely terrible CG in that year, but nothing special either.
Yeah…I’m gonna still blame ERASER. Reason being, JURASSIC PARK came out in 1993 and it had far superior CGI. JUMANJI came out a year earlier in ‘95 and even THE STUPIDS in ‘96 had better effects. Yeah. I’m putting THE STUPIDS effects work over everything on this list.
JP and Jumanji were effects-driven films whereas the crocodile in Eraser seems like a last minute decision in an action movie. But ok, you are right.
The fifth season of Lost had some pretty good CG though.
I think the No Country For Old Men clip is fine. Haters.
I like the chaos fox, even on the big screen. Was still hammy and surreal enough to work. But i may lay claim to being the biggest cgi hater. How many films has it ruined, and not just through single bad decisions like the croc in Eraser. I’m talking things like the wolfman jumping off a building in the new movie or countless other weightless atrocities from films where practical effects and suggestion would go so much further. When done near perfectly (and i can count few that match JP1/2, or War of the Worlds), it costs such a huge chunk of the budget and creative talent it’s only ever going to be a rare occurrence. In the old days, effects workers were creative, practical problem solving artists. Now CGI guys are mostly computer geeks going through the motions, exercising hardware and software. And if they make the new Gremlins movie cgi (and worse, 3D) I might quit ever seeing effects films again.
Avatar. Now don’t get me started.